Wednesday, June 08, 2005

YOU'RE A LIBERAL IF.........!

With apologies to Jeff Foxworthy

If you’ve called Bush a “loser”...you’re a liberal.
If you’ve called Bush a “liar”....you’re a liberal.
if you’ve called Republican’s “two-faced weasels”....you’re a liberal.
If you’ve called Bush an “a__h__e”...you’re a liberal.
If you’ve said “Republicans have never made an honest living”....you’re a liberal.
If you’ve called Republicans “corrupt”....you’re a liberal.
If you’ve called Republicans “lazy”.....you’re a liberal
If you’ve called Republicans “brown shirts”... you’re a liberal
If you’ve said Condoleezza Rice is a “tool of white leaders” “akin to a Jewish person working for Hitler”....you’re a liberal.
If you’ve called Bush a “Dumb f__k” you’re a liberal.
If you’ve called Bush “an uneducated real lying Schmuck”...you’re a liberal.
If you’ve called Pat Tillman a “Sap” and “idiot” for enlisting in the army to serve America....you’re a liberal.
If you’ve depicted Bush as a mentally disabled-sprinter that included a message on your flier that “voting for Bush is like running in the Special Olympics. Even if you win you’re still retarded”.....you’re a liberal.
If you’ve suggested that Donald Rumsfeld be assassinated against a wall.”... you’re a liberal.
If you’ve asked in a column “John Wilkes Booth, Lee Harvey Oswald, John Hinkley, Jr.—where are you now that we need you”.... you’re a liberal.
If you’ve screamed on a television show that a certain congressman along with his wife and family should be stoned to death... you’re a liberal.
If you’ve said that all black”Republicans all look alike”... you’re a liberal.
If you’ve called your black Republican opponent “A Negro Dr. Kevorkian...foot shufflin, head scratching ‘Amos and Andy’ who wants to maim and kill other blacks for the gratification and entertainment of ...white racists”... you’re a liberal.
If you’ve accused Republicans of “drugging Zell Miller” ...you’re a liberal.
If you’ve written “Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Liar”... you’re a liberal.
If you’ve called a Republican an “arrogant a__h__e”... you’re a liberal.
If you’ve called Bush “Hitler”... you’re a liberal.
If you’ve called Bush a “Nazi”... you’re a liberal.
If you’ve called Bush “Stupid”... you’ve a liberal
If you’ve called Bush “Dumb”... you’re a liberal.
If you’ve compared Republicans to the Afghanistan Taliban... you’re a liberal.
If you’ve complained that Republicans always play the race card while playing it yourself in elections... you’re a liberal.
If you’ve run televison commercials claiming that a vote for the Republicans would cause “more black churches to burn...you’re a liberal.
If you’ve run television commercials during a presidential campaign blaming Bush for the dragging death of a black man in Texas... you’re a liberal.

These are either direct quotes or descriptions of liberal statements or actions.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

LAZY? How dare you!!!

NewGnome said...

LAZY, Yea, I know. The Democrats complain that Bush, Rove and company are taking over the world, and belive me that's a lot of hard work. So to call them lazy is really an insult.

Zube Girl said...

What if you're a Democrat married to a Republican (who happens to not be fond of Bush and his 'Big Government') and you think the Patriot Act is perhaps the most unpatriotic manuever ever? Oh yeah, and you've called Bush a moron, but you're quite fond of many Republicans who happen to support the Separation of Church and State, and Choice? But, you're still fiscally conservative with regards to welfare and unemployment. What does that make you?

A liberal? Would my husband be a, erm, liberal Republican? Weird.