Wednesday, November 30, 2005


When Ray Bradbury wrote Fahrenheit 451 he got it wrong. He assumed that books in the future would be banned and burned. But today we know that “Fahrenheit 58" (The approximate temperature at which ink begins to dry most quickly) is the book he should have written.

It’s not books that are being burned today, its the words that are being taken from them daily. There are many words that we can’t say, can’t write, even in literature, and are not even supposed to think. (The French are even worse, they’ve eliminated whole dictionaries full of words in their country. No wonder they can’t even think anymore!)

Here are just a few of the old ones and a few new ones:

“N” word: (n....r) see, I’m not even allowed to write the whole word.
“C” word: “Christmas” eliminated from America for the season.
“G” word: “girl” There are no such persons only ladies no matter what the age.
“W” word: “women” Have you ever noticed that when the word “men” is used the grammatically corresponding word describing “women” is not women but “ladies.” Most notable in sports: It’s the Men’s and “Ladies’” long jump.
“M P” words: “melting pot” (ok two words) but it’s now the wrong definition it’s both politically and culturally incorrect and the new word describing America is “mosaic,” the first step in dividing the county. Guess the “melting pot” got too hot.
“I-A” words: Illegal Aliens is no longer acceptable...they must be referred to as “Undocumented Workers.”
“B” word: “Baby” is becoming a cancer on the butt of abortionists. Pre-birth human entities are now either an “unviable tissue mass” or “viable tissue mass.” A “tissue mass” whose whole wiggling body has been born up to the head is now called dead in late term abortion clinics.
“B” word: “Black” No: African American! If blacks aren’t blacks anymore, why are white people still called “white people?”
“W” word: “winner” No one is allowed to be called a winner anymore because it would be offensive to the loser which is just as offensive. Nobody wins or loses, we just play the game.
“C” word: “Christian” probably the worse word in the list. You can get killed calling yourself the “C” word, especially in Saudi Arabia.

So, George Orwell “1984" was more correct than Bradbury because the books are still here, they’re just filled with words we can’t say.


Anonymous said...

I'm a Caucasion American.

NewGnome said...

Glad you are. I was beginning to think there weren't any of us left. I, myself, am Swiss-Cheese American to be as specific about it as possible....smelly and full of holes.

Anonymous said...

Haha! I really am a Heinz-57 American(No relation to the Kerry's)

NewGnome said...

Where's a hamburger when I need it? NG