Saturday, August 13, 2005

AMERICA: THE WORST COUNTRY ON EARTH

Terrible news for Americans:



As a representative of today’s journalism I have terrible news about America and her problems. It pains me to have to report this but we Americans must face the real truth. Here are just a few examples from a variety of newspapers and web pages detailing the awful state of America.

Bad news on the home front:

* a meager 200,000 new jobs were created in July 2005.
* a sluggish two million new jobs created over the past year.
* sadly, more Americans have jobs today than at any other time in history.
* pathetically in the last two decades the U.S. has created more than 40 million jobs--twice as many as Europe and Japan combined.
* the poor U.S. has one of the lowest jobless rates of all developed nations.
* unfortunately CNN’s Lou Dobbs was dead wrong as he nightly flogged "outsourcing" claiming it was costing Americans jobs.
* unhappily, the Clinton recession was squelched by Bush tax cuts creating the shortest and shallowest recession in history.
* regrettably the collapsing Clinton air-filled bubble economy has been overcome by the Bush real economic expansion.
* sickeningly, American productivity has skyrocketed.
* woefully it must be reported that the Bush Tax cuts worked as they came at the bottom of the Clinton recession and we now, despite 911 and the war on terror, have one of the strongest economies in history.
* regretfully home ownership in America is at an all time high.
* worse, personal income has taken some huge jumps.
* painfully, not only have 3 ½ million Americans found jobs in the last five years, 11 million illegal aliens in America have too.
* gloomily the deficit it plunging and tax revenues are rising even with the tax cuts.

More bad new on the foreign front:

* even France is finally beginning to see the danger in Iran building nuclear bombs.
* lamentably English fortitude and resolve, so evident in World War II, has been rekindled because of the al Qaeda bombings there and the UK announced “we won’t cut and run.”
* waning success of suicide boomers in Iraq is ruining what we’re trying to report there.
* heaven forbid Iraq’s constitution could be ready for a vote one day before the deadline.
* regrettably Palestinians are resorting to strapping bombs to dogs or lobbing mortars into Israel because they can’t find enough suicide bombers who can make it through the wall of protection.
* horribly without a shot being fired, Libya has decided to end it’s nuclear program........

I just can’t stand it any more my friends. We just haven’t been able to turn around this terrible news.

As a journalist, I am crushed. The huge effort we’ve all made to keep America’s bad news at the forefront is failing. And America is failing because it’s succeeding beyond the wildest dreams of those pursuing these terrible policies of success. The mainstay of our profession “DOOM, GLOOM and DISASTER has failed. As comedian/funnyman Dick Gregory has so eloquently put it.....America is the worst country in the history of this planet.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I guess the liberals can't argue with that. Once a gain you told them! tooshay!

NewGnome said...

Unfortunately, they argue with it all the time, but I hope you're right...that I "told them." I wish I could take credit, but truth is "The American people themselves told them." Is this country great or what.

Anonymous said...

tooshay in deed.