NG got into trouble the other day. I forgot our wedding anniversary and my wife was really upset.
She told me, "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find my gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 4 seconds, AND IT HAD BETTER BE THERE!"
The next morning I got up early left her present in the driveway and left for work. When my wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough, she spotted my gift-wrapped box right where she told me to put it.
She was very curious, put on her robe and ran out to get it. She brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale...
My funeral services are scheduled for Friday.